Officially Becoming a Full-time SAHM

This was not an easy decision. As a child, I had always looked up to my mother, a full-time homemaker. I loved watching and helping her cook, and helping her whenever she let me. I always thought I was lucky that my mom was always there to pick me up from school and cook a healthy meal for dinner, everyday. Of course in my early years, I thought that this was just the norm, that everyone’s mom stayed at home. However, these days, it is far from the norm.

Today women are more highly educated today and have very high paying successful careers. And the women who choose to have children, they are expected to return to work after a “generous” maternity policy of three months.

Anyhow, being a dentist, I have a pretty flexible job. I could work part-time, either 2x/week or 3x/week. So when I was deciding to go completely full-time, it wasn’t an easy decision. It would be easy to do both, yes, work and be a mother. But I had to really grapple with that, did I want to do both? It felt easier to work part-time so that I wouldn’t really have to give it all up. I think THAT was the hard part, knowing I was giving it up, at least for now. Even writing this is hard.

But, I think the reasons I wanted to keep working weren’t strong enough, there wasn’t a ‘good’ reason. I don’t need it for financial or emotional reasons. And I definitely see more purpose in my role as a mother. As far as I know, there was never a shortage of dentists in California.

So I did it, I ‘inactivated’ my license today.

I know my identity can’t come from my career as much as my education has been a defining part of me. Now, my main role and task in life is to focus on my family. I’d be definitely happier focusing on one aspect. I give props to all the other SAHM’s out there, it’s not glamorous or easy, but the day-to-day toils will make a difference in the long run.

I want to thank my husband for completely supporting whichever decision I made, for my parents for supporting me all my life to achieve my educational pursuits, and for my fellow colleagues who didn’t look down on me for being a SAHM, but rather blessed my decision. It really meant a lot!

And for those that need to work or decide to work, everyone needs to make their own personal decision to what they think is best for their family. So I just want to bless you in that decision.

Thinking and Praying

So, what would be your first response if your husband came home one day and asked you if you wanted to move to London? I can’t remember what I said but my mouth just dropped and the emotions within me went into panic mode. The questions like “WHY London?”, “How will life be with a one year old?”, “He can’t be serious” spawned within me. First of all, I don’t do well with transitions, especially moving away from family and friends. I did that once after getting married and moving to the bay area, but now there stood the possibility of going further away, and I mean across the North American continent and Atlantic Ocean, not just 300 miles North.
So there is that big part of me that fears the unknown. But there is this smaller part, very small might i point out, that thinks it might be interesting and could be a great experience. Still to think of the magnitude of moving a family to a country I am vaguely familiar with, is scary.

So far, no one knows about this possible move except a few friends, not even my family. I don’t want to worry them until we are 100% sure we are leaving. I hope to write about my journey in London, if it happens, on this blog and also chronicle the months before.

Please pray for us, if you’re out there. =)